Do you ever feel like you fight the same battles over and over again?
Whatever the battle itself happens to be, I’ve found that it can be completely aggravating and easy to lose patience with oneself. However, at the same time, I’m really grateful for the struggle because I know that struggle is the one thing in my life that forces me to change.
It is struggle that often reveals to me I’m not as strong as I thought I was and reminds me of my infinite need to draw closer to God. It forces me to confront my fears with courage, to believe that God can do the impossible with me if I ask Him because He loves me and wants me in Heaven even more than I want to be there myself.
It almost feels like magic sometimes, to contemplate that, but even better and more concrete than any sort of magic. It’s the truth behind the fairy tales, the happily ever after that so far exceeds the imagination.
In short, I find in times of struggle I have to admit that I’ve grown up too much, that I’ve tried to do much on my own, and that in my heart I’m still a child. But it is in finding myself as helpless as a child that I truly know what it means to be a child of God. And it is this experience of the ever faithful and entirely undeserved love of God the Father that takes Heaven from a lofty and far off destination and brings it to the center of my heart.
In spite of my many weaknesses and struggles, in spite of myself, it is so much easier to chase after Heaven when it feels so near at hand.