So recently I’ve found myself having a sincere affinity for the disciple St. Thomas or “doubting Thomas” as he’s more commonly referred to in Christian circles. He is always brought up as an example of… More
I remember back when I lived in Virginia I used to go to Blackfriar’s Playhouse pretty frequently because of the amazingly talented actors and authentic rendition of Shakespeare’s many plays. (If that makes me hopelessly nerdy in your eyes so be it!)
One night during a production of the comedy “The Merchant of Venice” I remember being struck by one specific actor. He was not the lead of the play. In fact, he was the opposite. He drew my attention because I realized during the course of the show that he played at least 6 different minor roles each with a different costume and having only a few sentences of lines.
I was especially impressed with his ability to keep up with that many characters because I knew that in his shoes I would have made colossal mistakes. Being a very dramatic adolescent with a lot of insignificant child acting under my belt, I imagine I would have walked on stage in the wrong costume or forgotten when I needed to be on stage or said the wrong line… In short, I realized that a mistake in that role could have dramatically influenced the flow of the play and the overall quality of the show itself, even though the parts he played we’re deemed so insignificant that they only cast one actor to play them all.
Yet in a moment of theater magic, I was touched by the realization that without every single role in that show, without each minor character to offer a line of transition or deliver a message or provide a moment of comic relief the show would not have been everything it was that night.
We live in a world that has the terrible habit of trying to elevate the best of humanity to Divine heights. We “worship” leading men and leading ladies, the most athletic, the smartest, the richest, most influential, or the best looking. We place them on pedestals and endeavor to be like them, holding them as our models of achievement with our purpose in life tied to the degree of what we attain of that “glory.”
Yet, as often as the pride of humanity is flaunted as the satisfaction of our desires and a vindication of our existence I can’t help but stumble once more over my minor character actor and the nagging truth he pointed me towards. A truth that convicts me that this towering pride blinds to the humble reality of life, that in the quest to exalt the individual self we are blinded to our part in the whole story. Just like the minor characters each had a part to play in order for the show to go on, so too do we.
You and I are absolutely unique. Not only were we made by God we we’re made for a purpose and a glory that we cannot yet know as the story is still unfolding in time. And I think a lot of joy gets lost in a quest for mere worldly glory for two reasons. First, because worldly glory does not satisfy and leaves one ever restless. Second, because it steals the dignity we inherently have from being made in the image and likeness of God by making that dignity conditional.
But I propose that this set of actors are wiser than our media pundits, celebrities, athletes and other influencers because when the show was over they each came out and took their bow with a smile on their face. While I’m sure they were content in their hard work and dedication to their craft which made the overall performance excellent, I think their true joy was not in being perfect but in knowing that they had been part of something amazing together, something that would not have been possible without each and every person on that stage playing their part exactly as they were meant to.
I think the joy of heaven, and the joy of life on earth, is not in finding ourselves but in finding God and realizing that not only is He perfect love, but He makes each and every one of us a part of that love. That our glory will be not a monument like a towering tombstone but a reflection like a mirror of the love we’ve chased after and at last embraced, the love we became by being loved first by God.
And I’m sure that whether we were a lead or held the door for them, whether we were noted for our poetic musings or for sheepishly cracking a joke, we will be perfectly content with our part once we see it in the light of that final vision and behold the majesty of Heaven, because “eye has not seen, ear has not heard what God has ready for those who love Him.” (1 Corinthians 2:9).
I recently read a really interesting article by R.R. Reno over at First Things talking about “What Mary Teaches” Mary in this instance referring to the Blessed Mother. If I ever endeavored to write an article about the things that Mary taught me I imagine it would quickly cease to be an article and instead become a colossal book. One that I would love to write…
All dreamy tangents aside, R.R. Reno’s essential point is that Mary is a realistic hope of what can be accomplished by God’s love, mercy, and grace. Born without original sin in a dogma Catholics refer to as the Immaculate Conception, Mary is a true masterpiece of God: a creature who perfectly responded to and cooperated perfectly with God’s grace while remaining completely human (not at all divine). She is now in Heaven body and soul as God promises we will one day also be.
This is a wonderful promise one that the author rightly points out gets dimmed in the skepticism and self-centeredness of modernity. However, the thing that struck me most about it was the horrible question that rose in my soul.
Yes, as I was reminded by the author of the universal call to holiness and remembering that a desire for holiness and expectation of God’s abundant graces are not unrealistic nor delusions of grandeur but the fulfillment of the promise of God and His design for humanity, the horrible question rose and it lingered:
What sort of limits do you place on that love? What sort of limits do you place on that grace?
Because here is the horrible truth I was forced to confront. God places no limits on His love for me, but I place many limits on the love I’ll accept. Whereas God is love and longs to lavish His mercy in my own pride and timidity I insist on accepting instead only small graces, more in line with what I feel I deserve which, to be honest, most days isn’t very much. Whereas God calls me to greatness and remarkable feats of holiness, I think of my many weaknesses and the shame of who I’ve been and accept only an ordinary destiny afraid not only to be great but afraid to even think that sort of greatness is possible.
Yet, believe it or not, I’m glad I read the article and even recommend you do too because had I not read it I might still be imagining the limits I was accepting as coming from God instead of coming from me. And what a tragedy it would have been to accept my own forgetfulness, to conform to the image of our material world, to believe that fallen things stay fallen and never rise again, when the limitless love of God stands ready and waiting in every moment to make me new, to make me something great. Because with God greatness is not marked by achievement or fame or fortune but by the thing I’ve always wanted: a complete oneness with perfect Love, an everlasting union with God Himself.
May I just say I have missed all of you readers terribly. I started a new job and while I’m happy to say that I’m loving every minute of it I am busier than ever. Fortunately, my lovely and now Seattle based sister A.C. Wilson has written an amazing guest post that I invite you to read below. Please enjoy as our (mostly her) gift to you on the Feast of the Assumption:
One of my favorite movies ever is a Pixar movie called “The Incredibles.” It’s got everything- action, adventure, family values, coming of age…it’s a great movie (and I hear there’s a sequel coming soon! Yes!). And when reading the gospel, I found myself reminded of one of the last scenes in the movie.
The Incredibles family had just returned from their great adventure, and all is well, until they arrive home. Their youngest son Jack Jack, believed to be with a babysitter, had been kidnapped by the story’s villain, Syndrome. Just as they arrive, Syndrome takes off on his rocket boots with the baby in his arms, and the family is panicking. Suddenly, Mrs. Incredibleturns to her husband and says “Throw something!” and he replies, “I can’t, I might hit Jack Jack!”
But then an awesome revelation occurs, and Mrs. Incredible suggests “Bob, throw me!” and he does. It’s a perfect shot, and the baby, now tumbling from the sky, lands safely in his mother’s arms, and gets to the ground safely. Then Mr.Incredible, after hearing another threat to his son’s life, hurls his *new* car at Syndrome’s plane, and effectively destroys him.
And this whole turn of events reminded me of the parable of the wheat and the weeds, where Jack Jack is the wheat, an innocent baby who is nothing but loved by his Father, and Syndrome is the weed, which represents a person with evil planted deep in his heart by Satan. If Mr. Incredible had hurled his car at the retreating Syndrome too soon, it would have destroyed evil, but also his child. So immediately it was out of the question.
So it is with God and the problem of evil. He could toss his divine “car” and destroy Satan whenever he likes, but if it isn’t a well timed throw, he would, with his crushing blow, destroy our freedom to choose Him, making us little more than spiritual ants, with no say for our own souls. So immediately it is out of the question. Because God made us to be more than ants. And He can and will destroy evil, but not until the proper time.
But people don’t get this, myself included at times. We see sin in it’s ugliest, most base form, and naturally we are repulsed. As we should be. We have all grown up among the wheat and the weeds. But then we ask God “Why?” Why would a loving God make the world this way, with so much suffering and evil? And that is a question we cannot ask.
Because the real question we should be asking is “Why not?” In a world tainted by original sin, why do we not expect sin and evil to manifest itself? And this is not meant to be callous or unfeeling toward the suffering in the world. It is truly shameful that we allow certain sufferings to persist, heartbreaking when we can’t predict or mitigate it, and all around contrary to how God originally designed us to live. But the question remains, why should we expect the world to work in harmony and goodness, while the worldly, respected powers that be tried and convicted the true source of harmony and goodness (see: Christ’s Passion and death) for the crimes of mankind?
And that is the most extreme case, but I think it has real bearing in our lives today. How often do we blame our problems on God? How often do we neglect our prayers, and then blame God for being the cold and unfeeling one? How often to we distract ourselves every which way, and blame God when our lives have no direction? I know I do. Often.
But that acknowledgment is exactly why God holds back his judgment. Because we are sinful and sorrowful, weak and in need of a savior. He knows that, and He is our loving Father. When we truly believe that we are weak but God loves us, and rely on him, then the world becomes a less dark, sinful place. Plus, when we choose Him over all the temptations and delights of the world, a love that you know is true and unselfish is able to form.
Going back to our metaphor, when Mr. Incredible couldn’t throw the car, he sent his wife. So God sent His son, to save us from the seemingly insurmountable plot against us. It’s our job to resist evil, to allow Jesus to rescue us, and live the mission in gratitude. God will take care of the rest.